The Layers of the Earth. . .

The earth is an interesting place.  It is made of three layers.  Your teacher may have told you that it was made of rock and magma, but she was lying. 

In reality, the earth is made of Graham Crackers.  Some areas are cinamon grahamies…others are plain.  If you want to know what your continent is made of, simply lick the ground. 

The second layer of the earth is made of chocolate pudding.  Just like the kind that come in the little cups at the grocery store.  In fact, that’s where Jello gets their product from.  They’re stealing from the world. 

The center of the earth was once thought to be a dense ball of molten rock.  Particularly iron.  Teachers tell you this, however, because they don’t want you to know that the center of the earth is really a two thousand pound gummy bear. 

There is a scheme by teachers to keep kids uneducated about this gummy bear because they are currently digging a hole to the center of the earth in Wyoming to eat the gummy bear themselves. 

Don’t be fooled.  Your teachers are evil.

Signed,
Drunken Bob

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About Bill Ferriter

I'm a real-live, bona-fide, full-time practicing classroom teacher. #takeTHAT
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4 Responses to The Layers of the Earth. . .

  1. bo-bo cat says:

    What color is the gummy bear? It better not be green, because I hate the green ones.

  2. Rob Humphrey says:

    The second layer is actually 90% peanut butter and 10% grape jam.

  3. The Joker says:

    AWSOME!! the blurb is back!
    I can’t wait to see all the new posts you’re going to put!
    Retired Blurber,
    -The Joker

  4. Cheesy McPheasy says:

    lol this is great!!! Hey Bob!! You should make more of these! Like, you could make up a story about Roman history!

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